I'm a prisoner of words unsaid. Just lonely feelings locked away in my head. I trap myself further everytime I stay quiet. I start to speak but I stop and stay silent. And now I've made my own hard bed.
Inside a prison of words unsaid
Monday, December 4, 2006
Prejudice (Posted on MySpace 12/04/06)
prej·u·dice[prej-uh-dis] - an unfavorable opinion or feeling formed beforehand or without knowledge, thought, or reason.
I run a program called CPS Mentor Moms. It's a program for pregnant and parenting teens, and because it's funded by Chicago Public Schools, I spend majority of my time in the schools. I have had 3 encounters this school year with the assistant principal at one of the schools. Each time she has given me a really hard time, and I could never understand why, until today. It hit me. I think she has a hard time accepting my position according to my age. I think because I'm a young lady (and because I may sometimes LOOK even younger), she feels the need to verify everything I do, as though I'm too incompetent to do the job for which I have been hired. When I met with her today so she could sign a letter to verify my work in the school, and she refused to sign the letter. She wanted to talk to this person and talk to that person so she could know this and so she could know that. In essence, she wanted to go over my head to verify that what I was doing was legit. She speaks to me almost as though I am beneath her. It's like she uses me to proove her authority. I wanted to remind her that I have a degree, I am gainfully employeed, and I am NOT your child nor one of your students. I wanted to tell her, "I'm not here to work FOR you, I'm here to work WITH you to provide support and assistance to your students." All I needed was her signature. But I didn't say any of those thoughts. I didn't express my opinions. I smiled. I nodded. And I wished her well as I left the meeting empty-handed. An hour later she phoned me to let me know the letter was ready for me to pick up, complete with my signiture. I guess she verified that it was legit, I dunno, but she took up more of my time than I had to spare.